The Do-Not-Say List
by Dawn Klingensmith / © CTW Features.
On the advice of a participant in her communications class, Barbara Pachter came up with a Do-Not-Say List to help businesspeople avoid words and phrases that only serve to undermine their message and image.
Avoiding ‘weak beginnings’
Pachter calls them “weak beginnings,” and they include phrases like “I was wondering if perhaps …” and “May I ask a question?”
Just come right out and ask the question, Pachter advises.
Asked specifically about time-wasters in meetings, Pachter said [she] built on the original Do-Not-Say List that makes up Chapter 27 in her book, The Essentials of Business Etiquette: How to Greet, Eat and Tweet Your Way to Success. Phrases like “in my opinion” and “I have something to add” are inefficient, [and] they “make people sound tentative and unsure,” she says.
Don’t press repeat
“If you catch yourself saying ‘let’s revisit’ or ‘just to reiterate,’ it’s an upfront acknowledgment that you’re not contributing anything new,” Pachter says.
To be clear, “Some repetition can confirm to another person that you have heard what was said,” she adds. “But in a group meeting too much repetition can be viewed as one-upmanship—the need to let everyone know that you also knew that information.”
Enemies of productivity
Other phrases that are enemies of productivity and progress include “But it’s got problems” and “Whatever the group wants is fine with me,” says Stephen J. Lind, visiting assistant professor of business communication at Washington and Lee University in Virginia.
“Bad decisions are often made because no one was willing to speak against the flow even though they have important suggestions to offer,” [Lind says].
“Meetings often fail when certain phrases are missing,” Lind says, such as when a meeting lacks specifically stated goals and decision-making criteria.
Additionally, it’s well worth the time to wrap up every meeting clarifying what the next steps are, who is responsible and the timeframe for completion.
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